No Jeans for You!

University Clubnow hosts a weekly "Power Happy Hour." Fridays 5-8 p.m., anyone can enjoy the same views and drink specials that members do, and tab out at the end of the evening with cash or credit card.

Even though they're letting in non-members, that doesn't mean they're letting in anyone - remember, they have a strict dress code, so don't dress like a bum!

Todoist: The abridged version

Thur: Cocktails & Creatives @ Seven Bridges @ 7:00.
Fri: Badlands Trio @ 9th & Main.
Sat: Guys w/Ties White Party @ The Carling.

Todoist: Eat Your Heart Out. (That is, if you had a heart)

DVI is hosting a Downtown Dining Week August 20-26 called EatUp Downtown. For $25, you get a three-course meal at any of the participating restaurants (wine, tip, etc not included).

There looks to be an even share of Northbank and Southbank restaurants, and and a wide variety of cuisines (I love how Hooters is listed directly underneath Chew)

(Word through the grapevine is Cellar Grill is/has closed. Unconfirmed.)

Todoist: Coke, Hoes, Wine, and Birthdays.

Wed: Local film Cocaine Angel screens at MOCA as part of their Q&A series. $8 cover, $6 students. MOCA @ 7 p.m.
Wed: Thee Imperial hosts the Gemini Ball. Pimp/Ho theme, Pimp/Ho auction, Beer Pong, drink specials for Geminis. No cover for ladies (pre-midnight) or geminis (all night).
Friday: New wine bar Tastings celebrates their grand opening with deals, raffles, and live music.
Sat: Tastings continues their grand opening celebration with performances by Aerial Tribe @ 8 p.m.-midnite-ish.
Sat: Anomaly celebrates their two-year birthday with a summer party. 10% off all purchases, cold adult beverages, and excellent people. Anomaly in Five Points @ 6 p.m.
Sun: The Jacksonville Allstars kick it in Memorial Park. Kickball game @ 2 p.m.

Todoist: Guys and Dolls and Balls.

Thur: Dozens of local restauranteurs come out the play at the annual Foodfight benefitting Second Harvest Food Bank. $50 cover. Jax Municipal Stadium @ 6-9 p.m.
Fri: Classic bad-guy-loves-good-girl musical Guys and Dolls opens at Theatre Jax and runs through 6.23. $20 cover. Show @ 8 p.m.
Fri-Sat: Inconceivable! The Princess Bride shows as the Midnite Movie @ SMT.
Sat: Have your ever heard a death rattle? Boomtown's last night in the Subterranean space. $12 cover. Nocturnal Escape Soul Release @ 8ish.
Sun: The Jacksonville Allstars kick it in Memorial Park. Kickball game @ 2 p.m.

Todoist: Return of the Killer Tomatoes.

Tue: C10 hosts "Duck & Cover!" Helmets optional. After work-ish.
Wed: Artwalk Artcrawl Downtown. Rundown to come the day of.

Postscript: Thanks for hanging around despite my noticeable absence. I wish I could say it was a glamorous overseas vacation, but alas, it was just a couple intense work weeks.

Todoist: Fuck it, nothing's competing with the Film Fest.

Thur-Sun: Visit Jax film Festival's site for schedules of film viewings and parties.

Grey Goose Gala is Saturday @ The former Haydon-Burns Library.
Black and White Gala is Friday @ The Grotto.
The Talkies with John Waters is Saturday @ San Marco Theatre!
There's too much else to list it all.

(Read: I'm too lazy to list it all. See you out and about.)

Todoist: Beer before art, always smart. Liquor before golf, never fault.

Thur: Baseball's never been drunker with Thirsty Thursdays! Jax Suns host Birmingham. Tix run $6-$30, dollar beers all night. Game starts @ 7:05.
Fri: The Players comes to the Landing with interactive golf challenges and live music. The Players Downtown Experience @ 4, Fireworks @10.
Fri: OPAQ hosts a one-night-only art show to benefit the Jax Humane Society. Cheap art, great cause. Reception @ 8-11.
Sat: 9th and Liberty opens the Digital to Physical show: The concept of the show was to find artists online from all over and to assemble them together in a physical space. From digital to physical. It’s like online dating, but not really? Reception @ 6-10.
Sun: Jacksonville Asian American Alliance hosts a pre-JFF screening of Hero @ San Marco Theatre. $10 cover includes box lunch. Lunch @ 1, Movie @ 2.

Let me tell you about the boat show.

Todoist: Artistic Alcoholics.

Tue: The C10 gringos host Uno de Mayo. Margaritas, latin music, and sombreros shall ensue. Attendence by invitation only. After work until the tequila's gone.
Wed: Artcrawl. Remember to wear comfortable shoes - one never wants to spill free wine. Downtown @ 5-9.
Thur: Olive, formerly known as Luna, hosts a grand opening party and 20% storewide sale Thursday and Friday. Cocktails and light fare provided.
Fri-Sun: Sail Jacksonville docks at the Landing, and hosts self-guided ship tours, a viewing of The Goonies Friday night, and fireworks Saturday night. No cover. Reference site for activity times.
Fri: Jane Gray Gallery hosts the opening of Photo Process, alternative process photographs. OMG! Photos that aren't digital? They still make those? Reception @ 6-9.
Fri: Leo Rijn premieres his Monumental "Cat in the Hat" Bronze Sculpture and his newest Dr. Seuss Secret Art and Illustration artworks at R. Roberts Gallery. Reception @ 6-9.
Sat: 1951 Market hosts an art open house. The venue itself is worth checking out, plus art from excellent local artists. Opening @ 3-6.
Sat: Bogda hosts an art opening featuring a baker's dozen of artists, live music, and free adult beverages. Reception @ 8-11.

Todoist. All filler, no killer!

Thurs: AIGA Jax hosts mid-week binge drinking Cocktails & Creatives in the Southside. After work until we get thrown in the paddy wagon @ Buffalo Wild Wings.
Thurs: Free shots, cheap drinks, free Julius tix, and the friendlist DJ in town. Paul Zimmerman spins POP! @ Eclipse, midnight-ish.
Sat: St. Paul's hosts a community garage sale. I'll be praying for a cheap bicycle. 8 a.m. until?
Sat: Community Picnic in Memorial Park with proceeds benefiting St. Johns Riverkeeper. Lunch by Mossfire Grill, Burrito Gallery, Biscotti's, Sweet Pete's Catering and Casbah. $10 donation, lunch @ 1.
Sat: Riverside Avondale Preservation hosts a self-guided tour of ten historic homes. $15 admission, Saturday @ 10-5, Sunday @ 12-5.
Sat: Jacksonville's indie-rock darlings Julius Airwave play Freebird Live in celebration of their new release "The City The Forest" (drops May 8). Support by ShangraLa, Sensei, and Plain Jane Automobile. Cover $7-$10, Show @ 9.
Sun: Beer, sunshine, and good people pegging each other with an oversized rubber ball. Kickball in the Memorial Park at 2.

Todoist: Sit on your ass and be entertained. That's the American way.

Thur: POP! goes your sobriety at Eclipse as DJ Paul Zimmerman spins. First 100 through the door get a free shot of liquor, $2 drink specials all night. $2 cover.
Thur: Last chance to see the original South Korean horror movie The Host at San Marco Theatre before Hollywood turns out another B-Class remake a la Dark Water. Show @ 9.
Fri: SMT pretends to be an art house by showing the 2006 Oscar Nominated Short Film Program, both live action and animated (they make it a two-for-one double feature, if your ass doesn't fall asleep). Runs for the next 2 weeks.
Fri-Sat: Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon, a scary flick for people who love horror movies, plays at midnight at SMT. Just please go to the bathroom beforehand. We don't want anybody peeing themselves (with delight!)
Fri-Sat: Much Ado About Books embraces nerd-dom and celebrates books, with proceeds benefiting the Jax Public Library. Free Festival Admission, $40/Keynote Luncheon.
Sat: Modern music, classical instruments, presented by three hot Korean sisters. Seriously. Ahn Trio @ Church of the Good Shepherd @ 8. Tix run $25/general admission, $5/students.

Todoist: Politics+Design+Tombstones. Who could ask for anything more?

Thur: Check out baby-faced presidential hopeful John Edwards speak at FCCJ South. Or, stand outside with a protest sign! Whatever floats your boat. Speaking engagement @ 7:00 in the Wilson Center.
Fri: AIGA Jax hosts a speaking engagement withRafael Esquer of Alfalfa (NYC) at the Radisson on Salisbury. Reception @ 6, Speaking Engagement @ 7. Cover runs $5/members, $15/non-members.
Fri-Sun: The annual Jacksonville Jazz Festival is hosted downtown, including a performance by Chuck Mangione! (Music featured in Simpson clip above) Tickets run $10/general admission, $150/VIP. JJF for schedule.
Fri-Sun: After watching reruns of Six Feet Under on Bravo, the mood should be perfect for a cemetery tour! Tours of Historic Evergreen Cemetery run all weekend. Tickets run $12/adult, $4/children. Proceeds benefit Wolfson Children's Hospital.
Sat: AIGA Jax presents the annual Portfolio Review at the Radisson on Salisbury. A day to laugh, cry, and watch young hearts get crushed and splattered onto their life's work. Portfolio Reviews run 9 a.m.-5 p.m., and the alcoholic drowning of sorrows commences immediately afterwards. Check Jax AIGA for registration fees.
Sat: What's greener than the Chicago River during St. Patrick's Day? A bunch of people talking about global climate change and how to remedy it. JCNI hosts a conversation with local experts about Global warming followed by reception. Riverside Prrebyterian Church @ 2:00.
Sun: As the Beastie Boys said: "Let's kick it!" Kickball in the Memorial Park at 2.

Todoist: High Voltage!

Thur: Danger! Danger! Electric Six plays at Jackrabbits. $10 cover. Doors @ 8. [JR]
Thur: German painter Judith Rosenau opens at Burrito Gallery. Show @ 6:30. [BG]
Fri: Movin' 100.7 and Crowne Plaza sponsors "First Friday Deck Party on the River." Food and beverage specials, live entertainment, prize drawings, great weather and a good view. No cover. 5-8 p.m. @ Crowne Plaza. [DVI]
Sun: Celebrate Easter with brunch and kickball in the park. [KBC]

Todoist: I'm blaming it on the hangover.

Fri: Art After Dark @ Florida Theatre. $15 cover, $50 VIP. Event starts at 7. [AAD]
Fri: Love Brigade hosts a Charity Fashion Show @ Tera Nova. I know, I know, it's the Southside. But how many opporunities does one have to mention a guy who willingly calls himself "DJ Tiny Pants?" $15 cover, $25 VIP ($5 discount if purchased in advance). 8 p.m. [LB]
Sat: North Florida School hosts their annual Bachelor/Bachelorette Charity Auction @ Main Library. Sure, it's sort prostitution, but at least the proceeds go to a good cause. $50 cover, $150 VIP. Plus money to buy a man whore bachelor. Auction 6:30-10:30 p.m. [NFS]
Sat: Hipsters go monochromatic for the annual Black & White Ball @ TSI. Free Of Montreal tix for the best dressed. $5 cover. [TSI]
Sun: Of Montreal plays @ FreeBird Live. Doors @ 8, Show @ 9-ish. $12 tickets.

A very special Hump Day.

Today marks the 24th anniversary that Mommypolitan and Daddypolitan brought life into the world.

Celebrate little miss Jaxopolitan's B-Day at Burrito Gallery after work. Happy hour drinks until seven, inappropriate conversation and uproarious laughter until they kick us out.

A movie for girls who like guy movies.

[image via That Other Blog]

300 opened at the San Marco Theatre last weekend. What better way to watch a quintessential guy movie than with a pizza and a pitcher of brew?

This movie has taken a lot of shit for its glorified and graphic violence, and linear plot. And that's okay. 300 wasn't made for the masses. It was made for the comic-book-reading Tarantino-loving guilty-pleasure-indulgers.

The only problem is, I don't feel guilty about taking pleasure in it.

Not as gruesome as Kill Bill v.1, but almost, guys will love this flick for the decapitations, refusal to back down (much less surrender), and raging testosterone.

Ladies, I know. Looking at the blood and guts is icky. But while they're fighting, they're doing so in little more than leather speedos and crimson capes. If you're doing payback from dragging your man to some shitty chick flick like Because I Said So, you might as well pick your battle, and have some serious eye candy.

Of course, the plot does glaze over a lot of the detail and intricacies of Sparta, and the battle itself. If at all possible, I suggest watching Last Stand of the 300 on the History Channel before watching the movie, as it is an excellent documentary and fills in the gaps.

A little History Channel to help you dork out, a little Hollywood to help you freak out - This has the makings of an excellent weekend.

What a Tool.

Progressive rock band Tool will grace Jacksonville with a stop on their Summer 2007 tour with a stop at the Veterans Memorial Arena on Saturday, June 2.

The band is touring in support of their most recent release, 10,000 Days, which has already sold 1.4+ million copies.

Tickets are available via TicketBastard, but all floor tickets have already sold out, so unless you want to get stuck in assigned seating, it's on to Craigslist.

This will be Tool's first stop in Florida in 5 years. Attendees from the Lateralus tour described it as a religious-like experience.

Nine Inch Nails last year, and Tool this year? Congrats, Jax, this little city is drawing some big names.

Todoist: Benefit some charities, then mooch food off the land developer.

Thur: Thursday Night Drinking Club grunges it at Shantytown in Springfield. $5 donation benefits the Speech and Hearing Center of Jacksonville. One free PBR (Ohh, how hipster! How Ironic!) and $2 Yuenglings all night. 7 p.m. until last man standing.
Thur: Flux Productions hosts PB&J (Party, Benefit and Jam) with a handful of local performers. All proceeds benefit Jax Hubbard House. Ragland's in Five Points @ 8:30.
Fri: 300 opens at San Marco Theatre. I was actually worried I'd have to venture all the way to the Petri Dish Southside to see it.
Fri: El Topo, "The Definitive Cult Spaghetti Western" shows as the midnight movie at San Marco Theatre. Shows midnight-ish.
Sat: The Shipyards hosts a model opening shindig with refreshments and live music. Check out the model home, and dream of marrying up so you can afford to live there. The Shipyards @ 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

Todoist: Beware the Ides of March. Nah, beware drunk kiddies two days after.

Thur: AIGA Jax hosts Cocktails and Creatives at Fionn McCool's Irish Pub. After work until last man standing. [AIGA] | [MCL]
Fri: Some bull named Martin is having a birthday shindig at Burrito Gallery. Expect the usual suspects. [BG]
Sat: Amatuer Night Saint Patty's Day is held throughout the city and beaches. The beaches are always a clusterfuck, so I suggest a little Burrito Gallery/London Bridge/Bay Street action. [BG] | [LB] | [TSI]