Todoist: Best of coffee, phallus, hippies and hipsters

Tuesday: Folio Weekly's Best of Jax Party @ Pearl. Attendance by invitation only. Time to hit Craigslist to beg for tickets. It's not prostitution if it's not for money. [FW]
Tuesday: Help support Uncommon Grounds, from getting killed by a Construction/Starbucks molotov cocktail. Oh, and they're be music, too. [UJ]
Tue-Sat: Joseph and the Polysyllabic Musical, the gayest Christian performance to hit Jax since Veggie Tales, hits the Times-Union Center. Seriously, that cucumber's got something going on. [FCCJ]
Thu-Sun: Magnoliafest celebrates ten years of longhaired hippie bastards getting stoned to mediocre music. At least it gets my stoner roommate out of the apartment for a few days. [MF]
Saturday: The opportunity to make a complete ass of yourself, both locally, and on national tv! Auditions fpr Stupid Pet and Human Tricks for The Tonight Show @ The Humane Society. [CBS]
Saturday: TSI celebrates one year of hipsters hating poseurs who wish they were hipsters but who just aren't obscure enough. Wait, what? [TSI]